I'm falling in love with you.

Hello!

I'm back from another week with Fuzzy! It was a super good week, like... Tenby good.  I really fucking enjoyed it! The first two days we did a lot of walking and being silly. Like... running around doing whatever we wanted to do! Being kids basically and I loved that. It was so happy and perfect and nice to see him again!

Then he had his bike test for module 2. I was insanely nervous because I was scared that if he failed then he would be miserable. While he went off to do that I went for a walk with his mum!! Oh ma gawd, that was a bit... significant xD we had mostly small talk for half of it which was nice and awkward, but the last half we talked quite a bit about his ex and that situation and she made me feel better about so many things. She told me how they just argued so much and that she now sounds really happy with this new dude which I'm glad for, for selfish reasons, because it means she will be less of a problem for us. I also managed to express how I wanted her to know that I didn't try to move in on their relationship, which she said she knew. So that was really nice and I felt really happy afterwards because it's like... bonding isn't it? =P I also talked to his Dad for a little bit, I say talked... it was more like listen =P. So anyway, Fuzzy came back and he had passed!!! WHEY! Happy days! So he was really pleased with himself and I was pleased because it meant that he was in a good mood, so the rest of the day was really good. There was a little blip just before we went to bed when his ex got brought up again and I got a bit cranky and ended up telling him off for going on his phone too much, but in a really bad way, which made him grumpy. But he still hugged me at night :3

The rest of the week was just damn near perfect though! We went for quite a few walks in the sunny sun! Many of them in Formby! One day we made a picnic and went there. That was the highlight really because the weather was incredible! The picnic was really cute :3 and then after we went for a walk, got an ice cream. Found a spot in which we fooled about for a bit. We threw a ball, collected some shells, dug a hole in the sand and then relaxed for a bit. Whilst we were winding down Fuzzy was really quiet and seemed to be thinking about something so I sat down and waited for him to speak and it wasn't until I was playing with some sand that he just goes:

"I'm falling in love with you Heather."

And I just fucking froze. I shit you not the first thing that went through my head was that I had just made that up and he didn't really say it. But then he carried on talking and he was telling me about how happy we are together and how he feels around me and how the things we do are the things he's always wanted to do etc. And I just started crying, honestly I was barely listening to what he was saying because "I'm falling in love with you Heather," was just repeating in my head again and again. I genuinely am so shocked and happy that someone out there feels that way about me. The feeling of actually being loved, in any measure, romantically by someone is incredible and I've never been more happy and scared at one thought before. I didn't manage to say much because I was so emotional, and the last thing I wanted to do was copy him and be insincere. So I told him that he has made me happier than I think I ever have been. And we both smiled and kissed a lot and went back to the car in the fucking clouds man.

The day after that Fuzz made a huge leap and he actually got on a train with me! We wanted to go to Formby to find this pub and have a drink and a meal (which I very gladly paid for ^_^, I kind of like spoiling him.). The train ride there was fairly smooth sailing from the outside, but he told me he really struggled with it, the way back was much easier and he felt really proud of himself! I'm so pleased! I tried really hard not to be... essential. Because I don't want him to rely on me, this has to be something he learns how to do himself. The pub was amazingly cute! And we had a really nice conversation, he told me about his past problems and the times in which he has been truly bad and I felt like he really opened up to me.

The day before his birthday was the day that I said it back to him, which was the day before I left. It had been up and down, he had opened my present and really liked it, even though the GODDAMN HAT was too small!!! So I'll have to replace that.... but the comic he really liked, and the card ^_^. We went bowling as well, and he was bummed because his family didn't end up coming along even though he dropped hints, so I tried my best to make it really funny and enjoyable which I think I did very successfully! We also had a Frankie and Benny's (ofc) and it was all good and fine, until we got home again, and he went straight back down to angry because of Creg. I stupidly said exactly what he didn't want to hear when he was mad and made the situation a bit worse, but we had another talk later that night which I really enjoyed. We talked about getting to know each other and the different things you learn over time. It was that night that I said back to him "I've been falling in love with you for a long time." Which is true, I have been. Since the beginning of this year really. I told him, and he smiled and hugged me and I think it meant a lot to him. I lied a little bit, in the sense that I didn't tell him outright that I loved him. Because I do =) almost unquestionably now. I love him.

It was such a good week and I am so upset that it might be ages before I see him again. 6 weeks max. I just have to get this degree out of the way! =D

Rhubarb
xxxx