And here it goes again.

So... I'm trying to get healthy again.

Ever since I've been seeing fuzzy I have put on all of the weight I lost and then some. So, I feel like it is time to get back on the horse. I actually started my last successful regime around this time last year so I am feeling optimistic because I'm starting a little earlier, so I'll get a good head start and then I'll be prepared for winter to try and keep it up again! =D

I have been feeling very self concious about myself around fuzzy and I think it is ruining things a bit, I need to get my confidence back so I can give him what he wants and to be honest, what I deserve to give! He tells me that he finds me really attractive even as I am now, but it's not enough. I need to feel it myself. But one thing that I have realised I do, is that I say to myself, you're ugly now, but you will be beautiful. And I think that this is not the way to be. I should accept that I am beautiful now and strive to make myself even more so ^_^. This is the difference. I will be stopping myself from thinking negative thoughts.

Today has been a really good day already. I'm back on the diet, and I will be Davinaring and cycling and running whenever I can. Also, want to do my squats and sit ups every day no matter if I've done exercise or not. I've already been for a long walk today, and I'll be doing those tonight. Tomorrow morning is Davina morning. I'm so ready to do this again. I need it. I miss my old self when I was happy and confident. I'm fed up of hating myself.

Love to you all

Rhubarb
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