What is wrong with me!?

I don't know what is going on lately.

So, fuzzy came back from the tour on monday and I was really excited to talk to him again properly! But everyday since then we haven't really had a proper conversation. Every time we have spoken on the phone it has been short (by our standards = 1 hour) and he has felt really uninterested. And even on whatsapp I feel like I'm pestering him all the time because he only replies to what I send. This has really upset me because I feel like he doesn't want to talk to me! Like he's not interested in me any more! And I hate feeling this insecure. He also mentioned that bitch face has been talking to him again and now my paranoia is going CRAZY. It doesn't help that Snippy totally thinks he is still seeing her. But I KNOW he isn't. It's just thi stupid insecurity!

I got a little upset with him yesterday because I phoned and then he went within like half an hour ebcause he was tired and I just got fed up because I was like "again?" But see the thing is, he HAS been really busy! So it's fair enough right? And I realised this and apologised and back tracked. I said to him and myself that I would back off now and I'm just going to let him contact me. But he barely has so far today.... so I'm all upset. And I PROMISED myself I wouldn't cry again but I am! That's four fucking days in a row.

GET A FUCKING GRIP GIRL! WHY ARE YOU SO GODDAMN INSECURE! No one wants to date that. So I'm going to try my best not to show it. It's just really been getting to me and I feel on edge and upset all the time. I'm really scared that he is losing interest in me. I'm really scared for what it's going to be like when he comes down south.

Oh god. I just want him to talk to me.