Fucking Fried Chicken.

YOOOOOO

So I've been failing a bit with my eating and exercise, I had fried chicken last nights... lots. But I've done Davina again this morn! I refuse to let it slip completely, even if I lose it every now and then. I want to be happy and feel good about myself when Fuzzy is here otherwise I won't be able to be confident, which I need to be! he's mentioned quite a few times now that he wants me to be a bit more dominant towards him, which I totally think I can do! I'm a bit of a switch anyway, the idea of tying him up MASSIVELY turns me on, so it should be fine. It's just having the confidence to do it. Also our... special item arrived in the mail yesterday... that is a collar :3. It looks much better than I hoped! We had to go for purple because black was out and the purple has turned out to be much darker than the picture which is good! Also the metal is silver, and the buckle is lockable. The thickness of it looks pretty good, not a thin one but not so thick that I can't bend my neck. The best thing about it is that we have to go to Pets at Home to pick up a lead!! HAHAHAHA! Oh my god, that is going to be hilarious. I can't wait. I'm so glad he is up for that kind of thing! We've been talking a lot more now about experimenting, types of roleplay we'd like... getting into much... messier kinds of sex. No scat. Calm your tits. I can't frakin' wait! There is so much to try! I'm so glad I get to try all this stuff with him!

We've been a bit rocky the past week or so, quite a few little... bickerings. They have all been resolved but it has left a bit of a bad taste. For once I was the one getting mad though so that felt... a bit better. He started being really horrible to one of my housemates so I told him that it upset me, he got really fucking shitty about that and I got mad. He eventually apologised and that was fine. But then again he started talking about tattoos... and how he felt about me getting one and then saying a few things about my piercing which made me really fucking upset! Firstly... ouch. Secondly, how fucking dare you think that you have any say with what I do to my body! Fucked me off that one! But... once again... he apologised and all is well ^_^.

He's been in a really bad mood lately as well, he's back in his rut. Not doing anything, feeling ill and feeling sorry for himself. I think he is projecting that on me a bit, making himself focus on any problems we might have and worrying about it.

Something REALLY good happened though! He FINALLY told his ex about us! In... so many words ¬___¬. He told her something along the lines of he is getting romantic with me. That's... not exactly telling her that we are seeing each other like I'd hoped, but fair enough, he told her, now we just have to wait a bit before putting it up! BUT, once he had told me this he started saying how now he was going to wait for her to change her profile pictures and I was just like "Not again!? Really? We have to wait for her signal STILL? When does it get to the point where it doesn't fucking matter any more and it's just what we want to do?" So I said... something along the lines of "do we really have to wait for her" and he got PISSY. Fucking SO pissy! Started saying how he didn't understand women, and I was just like HOLD THE FUCKING PHONE, I'm just voicing a justified concern! I'M ALLOWED TO GET GODDAMN FED UP! After waiting this long! Yes I get it, we're nearly out of the tunnel so just hold on. But my patience has been worn so thin! I honestly don't think I CAN wait that long!? If it takes longer than two weeks I will no be happy. I was just looking at facebook, seeing my cousins new boyf and it just upsets me that I can't publicise it! I want people to know: I've met someone! He's great and I'm fucking happy!

BLAH.

Work is nearly done! I have 951 words left in TOTAL! But I still have a LOT of editing to do :3. Most of what I have written lately is utter shite. So I'll still be working while he is down here. Snippy is coming up Saturday for us to hang out then Fuzzy on Mondat to stay for... however long. I can't wait. 4 more days.

LOVE
Rhubarb