Well. It happened. It fucking happened. I went and I bloody met Mechanic Guy. It was.... amazing.
Almost straight away we were at ease. There was *never* a second of awkwardness even when we were in complete silence. The first day it was a teeny bit weird for the first hour and then it didn't feel weird any more so we kept saying to each other "it feels weird that it doesn't feel weird!" We did a bit of walking and exploring, we went down to this bay thing and did a load of climbing over rocks which was really fun and painful because it cut my feet and hands up but I still enjoyed it. We also got fish and chips and sat down and ate in the town and then we went to this place in his car and sat down in it and listened to Pink Floyd and did a bit of stargazing. One thing that was odd (but in a good way) was that we could sit in complete silence in his car and it wasn't awkward at all, in fact it was enjoyable! We kept just staring at each other... and I know that sounds weird but it was just so strange to finally be face to face. I really like his car. It's a good space to be in because I know he loves it so much and I like being in the passenger seat because he is a really good driver. I trust him completely which is weird even though at times he goes quite fast, I actually like it because I know I can trust him to not be stupid about it. At one point he gave me his car keys to go and wait for him in the car, I so easily could have just driven off... I felt really privileged to be trusted that much by him :3 ALSO! HAHA! The funniest thing happened on the first day, I asked him if he wanted a cookie and he snapped his head round, wide eyed and was like "You what!?" and I realised it sounded like I said "want a quickie?" HAHAHA. So I had to explain "COO-KIE.... a fucking coo-kie!" So funny. And also that night as we were driving back, these bloody badgers were in the middle of the road and they tried to scamper off but there was this cattle grid and they kept slipping and sliding and falling down and one was left behind and it was the funniest thing, I nearly wet myself. And further on down the road this cat tried to run away but it was on a country road so it had nowhere to go so it was just streaking away in utter panic xD hohoho, funniest thing.
The next day was a little bit quieter because he wasn't feeling too well, so we didn't do much walking but that was good in it's own right because we went to this place with lilly-ponds and sat down and had a really nice talk, like a heart to heart that we hadn't done yet. We also went in the sea and he was really wimpy because it was all cold and then I had a bit of a freak out about my body image which I regret a bit. Then we went for a meal and he paid which I am slightly annoyed at, only because he paid before I had the opportunity to give my well prepared "let me get the first meal" speech :3 but I appreciated it anyway. Then we hung out in his car again, listened to music, and a couple of things happened, I managed to demonstrate my taste in music and I think he was really impressed, and also I played Gustav Holst (Jupiter) which we both like and he got a bit emotional. I didn't realise until he told me just how emotional he got but I was just to touched to be around someone who feels music the same way I do. After that we went somewhere we could stargaze and we sat in his car for a while waiting for it to get dark and then we went on the beach for a little walk (by moonlight, Jesus H Christ =P) and we hugged and he hugged me from behind, it was really fucking nice and I know it sounds so twee but it was a big deal I think, we hadn't really touched each other properly and it broke a barrier. He said something that worried me a bit though, basically along the lines of "I don't know what I'm doing, I don't want to lead you on." and I tried to tell him but I don't think I used the right words that I understand so completely where he is and I just want to go with the flow, take it slow, there is no fucking rush, I won't get ahead of myself, I won't push him to get ahead of himself either. But it's hard to bring that up without looking like I already am getting ahead of myself xD Anyway, after that we sat down on some chairs and did a bit of stargazing, after a while I sat on his lap and we snuggled under the blanket which was fucking adorable and embarrassing at the same time because it's hard to get comfy on those bloody chairs =P
The last day was miserable because I didn't want to fucking go. We did a lot of just sitting around, talking, staring at each other and just being in each others company. I was really upset at the station, we cuddled a bit again and I was trying to hard not to cry and when I got on the train I waved a smiled but literally as soon as he was out of sight they just came pouring out! I mean fuck! I didn't realise how upset I was but I was *sobbing*! On the fucking train! xD. What a dipshit.... I just really didn't want to go because it was so much fun and it's made things so much more difficult that it's like... now what? But we've already started talking about when we are going to meet up again, so, I think I can safely say it was a success! =D
Side note, week 13, lost 3 lbs over the last week =D F yeah.
I AM VERY HAPPY
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